southernhustlin (southernhustlin) wrote,
southernhustlin
southernhustlin

i cried my last tear yesterday...

stolen from 9045...

1) List ten things you want to say to people but know you never will.
2) Don't say who they are.
3) Disable comments.
4) Never discuss it again.

*i could only think of 5*

1. I'm actually not sorry that things have turned out this way. I hope that your able to live with the consequences of your actions. I have never been as hurt or disrespected as you made me feel when you did what you did and for that I will not forgive you. And I certaintly will never forget. All we did was be there for you and help you when you needed it....who was willing to help you pay for the "solution" to your "situation"...a situation that had nothing to do with us?? Thats right. &dont forget it.

2.Even after all of the lies, deceit, and hurtful things that went on with us, I still tried to be the bigger person. Ive looked beyond what happened between us--and my offer still stands. Happy Birthday.

3.I love you and miss you so very much. It is trully indiscribable. Ive felt a void for the past year that I realize may never go away--and Ive accepted its pesence. Im so tired of feeling so empty and hope that one day things will get better for myself as well as everyone else, whose life you touched. As a child i was closer to her--then as i grew i became closer to you. But it feels like it was too late---I had a dream about your death about a month before it happened, awoke in tears and breathless. And that is how ive felt since March 15,2005. I dont wish to have you back just for one second because i know that it would only make me miss you even more [though it sounds impossible]--i just pray that you know how much i love and miss you and that i still wish the best for you, though i know your in a better place. Please continue to watch over me from up there just like you did when you were here. I Love You.

4. I know we are friends and somewhat involved as well--but sometimes i feel like we--no I have made a terrible mistake. Maybe we should have just left things as they were because knowing that i have no intetions or desire for a relationship--weve gotten to deep. We're too close for comfort. Maybe next year, when were gone together, i can give you what you want, that relationship, just not now--when i cant promise you that ill be faithfull or give you 100%...you know. its all or nothing.It really has nothing to do with you..Im just not ready.

5.Its cray that you could be my first love&first lov(er) and even though you've gone to school we can only have any sort of conversation when your not involved w| someone else. Have you not let go?? Or do you not want to??
Tags: tryintofindthewords*
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